it ain't what you do

It's so much like conversation, dance.

At swing tonight, I eavesdropped to my heart's content.



So interesting to watch how some people are terribly awkward with each other. The communication's simply not there and they spend the whole dance missing steps and recovering. It's best to watch when they have a sense of humor and take the four minutes to laugh at themselves. Then the same two people can split off, find other partners, and have a smooth, creative dance with them. Beginners too- your pair is always out there.

My best conversation tonight was with a man in his 60's. I just understood what his hands were saying and we were about on the same level, learned some dance moves together and laughed at missteps. It was easy and pressure free.

The worst was with the Rico Suave of the group. There's always one. In Austin it was a man about 4'5, who's eyes hit breast level and never much cared to stray. He came week after week and didn't improve. The dance was clunky and he'd get mad if you didn't follow his weak lead well. Most of the time that involved refusing to spin because you were wearing a dress and he tended to fall on his knees after making you twirl. Yilk. The man tonight was grey haired fat shirt untucked smelly saggy handed leerer and had the breast problem as well. How are interesting are they guys, really? I couldn't concentrate on anything because all I wanted was to go cover up, or throw up.

My favorite conversation to eavesdrop on was a pair of young teenagers. The guy looked to have just grown 2 inches and didn't have full control of the extra length. His shirt was a little short at the sleeves and his pants too long. He had a fallen bleach blonde mohawk greased to his head. His girlfriend was makeup-free, big round glasses and a look of constant shock. She wore a frumpy red dress, held in place with a vinyl white belt. Her shoes were flats of an off-red color and it all clashed beautifully. They were trying so hard, running into each other and stepping on toes, but never giving up. Both were sweaty and determined to dance every dance. I wanted to squeeze 'em.

I could go on and on- about how confident people can make almost any conversation work and how folks who are too self absorbed miss out on the fun of a two way exchange. And how all this reminds me of the new people I've met this week and the way our conversations unfolded, helping me to not take good connection for granted. But it's late and I haven't got the energy to correct this all properly. It was good to get out and shake it tonight, if only for an hour, 'cause "it ain't what you do, it's the way that you do it...ain't what chu do..."