But I get to be happy single girl again! It’s a new realm for me and I love newness, novelty even. There’s no tie whatsoever- to email, or other internethood, or to the phone, no dates/ appointments to keep. Relaxing.
No one to impress, which I realized is part of the reason I’ve been growing out in all these directions. I tend to act like a plant, relationship as the sun- grow towards that. Now there’s sun everywhere. Expand.
Partner hunting is a habit, I am realizing. I have these “happy single girl” thoughts, then run into someone that seems really nice, interesting, attractive, whatever (bike shope today) and I think, “Oh! Form a connection. Continue this.” It’s just a habit. Now that I see these thoughts for what they are, it’s a lot easier to let them go. Walk away from him.
My body’s also grown a misplaced third eye to help in the process. I figured I’ll just leave makeup behind to help it along.
Got to verbalize these things sometimes- make them real, take them home.
1 comments:
It's at the end of a very long and arduous spiritual journey that a person is really prepared. I decided to give up on that as a general goal, prepared to blunder blind into all sorts of damage in this life, and make the best of things when I get there.
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