letter

I've been made sad by recent conversations with a young man in my life.

He got to see his father over Thanksgiving and I am so happy for both of them, this time they got to spend together.
But almost all I hear him talk about now are the things his father bought him. And how expensive they were. And how many more things he wants now.

"To be rich but not materialistic"

I want to write him a letter. Or in this day and age, an email.

Dear boy,

I want to write to you as though you were one of my peers, my close friends, in total honesty.

I understand that you might be angry or defensive about what I have to say. That's natural. I'm defensive myself and have to go through a period of attack before I hear the words or ideas another presents. Feel free to do that. Or perhaps you'll find my words worthless and ill placed. That's okay too.

But I just need to say something, lest I rest uneasy.

I am concerned for your attachment to material things. The newest this, the greatest that. Do you see how it never ends? How there is always something else to want and that you are never satisfied? I get the urge, I feel it too. The only way to have control is in awareness.

Please know, this is not what's important in the world. It is an unquenchable desire and it'll never been fulfilled. It will never make you happy, ever.

After your trip, I expected to hear all the things you got to do with your family, maybe shared jokes even. Something delightful in the interaction. These are the things that last, that build upon each other and create a whole force in your life. Not the material things. They break, fade, are lost. They hold nothing but basic function.

When you talked about hanging your photos in the local coffee shop, I was so excited for people to see your art, your passion, your capturing of the world. When you said it was just to sell them, I was completely deflated. The money is nothing. Expression is the beauty.

I could go on, but instead I will just ask you to look closely at what you really want. And why. How long-term it is and how it fulfills you. Follow that which makes you most whole, the biggest version of yourself. Everything else will fall into place behind it. Some people would say this is unfair to ask a freshman in high school, but you've shown me better. I know you have wisdom and depth and potential for amazing growth. Please continue to flesh it out, breathe life into it.

I have a lot of faith in you and our rather unexpected connection is a blessing in my life.

Best,
Mar